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LGBTQIA+ Pride: Why is little known about asexuality?
Whenever people are asked to define asexuality, the reply is often far from the truth. Many personal beliefs and understandings are more myths and legends rather than reality. Though not as mainstream as other LGBTQIA+ identities, it is estimated that almost 1% of the world’s population identifies as asexual. Given the growing numbers, why is little known about asexuality and aromantic individuals?

What is the difference between gay love and lust?
There is often a misconception outside of the gay community that gay people are casual when it comes to sex, preferring open or commitment-free relationships. Many perceptions are often fuelled by the wide range of smartphone apps, parades and tv shows in which gay men and women are shown only in a sexualised way with little or no depth. With many gay couples across the globe getting married and starting families, how promiscuous are the gay community? Or is it simply people not understanding the difference between love and lust?
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Asexual
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"I like my women the way I like my men; I don't."
ANONYMOUS
An asexual individual can be defined as someone who is male, female, within the spectrum or as non-binary. Asexual people feel no sexual attraction or desire for anyone, which means they have no sexual orientation/identifier. The extent or scale relating to the lack of sexual attraction may include emotional, physical and/or romantic. Unlike celibacy, which is a choice a person makes not to form sexual or romantic connections, Asexuality is not a choice. Asexuality is also known as Ace, a term used as an umbrella to include all variations within the asexual identity.
Other associated sexual identifiers:
- Aromantic (pronounced – ei-row-man-tuhk | ərəʊˈmæntɪk) – though often grouped under Asexuality, Aromantics are different. An individual who identifies as aromatic (also known as aro) may or may not feel sexual attraction; however, will have no desire for romance or create romantic relationships. The majority of aromantics prefer friendships and other non-romantic relationships. In addition to identifying as Aromantic, individuals with sexual desires may also identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual etc.
SUMMARY
- No sexual attraction or desire
- Ace is another term used for Asexuality
- The lack of attraction or desire can include emotional, physical and/or romantic
- Asexuality is not common; it is believed that as little as 1% of the world’s population identifies as Asexual
- Generally, more women than men identify as Asexual
- Asexuality is often compared to the Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder (HSDD), given that the condition relates to a lack of sexual attraction
- Asexuality has been around for some time, and in the 1860s, Karl-Maria Ketbeny used the world “monosexuals” to refer to people who only masturbate
- It is believed that many Aromantic people are Asexual; however, some may experience sexual attraction rather than romantic feelings or love
Many will share similarities and even unite within the common cause for equality and legal recognition. However, how a person chooses to identify can vary greatly depending on the country, society, and culture they live in. The pride-in series will help them connect with their community and provide many reasons to be proud, regardless of how they choose to identify or love. Whether a person is straight, gay, transgender or cisgender, the pride-in series is for everyone and highlights that we are all unique and special.
Acceptance and coming to terms with how a person chooses to identify or love, especially accepting it themselves, is hard. The process of self-discovery and acceptance is often the most significant and challenging step for anyone from the LGBTQIA+ community. The acceptance process can be complex and made worse when we cannot connect with or identify others like us. Failing to find positive representation can make a person feel disconnected, alone and isolated.
The reality is that once a person becomes aware that others out there think and feel as they do, even in part, it can be liberating. Often, it helps them feel represented and reassures them that they are not alone. No one is the same, and if a person cannot identify with a group, it does not mean there are not others out there who think and feel similarly. Sexualities, identities, age, and circumstances are not always easy to group, define, or even be fluid.
Being different from the majority is not always easy. Understanding and accepting who they are often takes immense courage, especially given the risks many will likely face. Positive representation and education can help, giving them a platform to take pride in who they are or have become. There is no right or wrong, normal or different, just unique people with common goals and with aspirations to be free, loved, and safe.
Learn more about the extensive resources available on Gayther, which takes pride in all the groups that form the global community, including those from conventional identities and sexualities. Ultimately, remembering that we are all unique and special, and how we identify and choose to love, is part of who we are as individuals, but not the only thing that defines us. Love is love, and accepting those different to us is crucial in a free and fair society.











